Thursday, 13 July 2017

Neighbours: Quotes From My Teenage Diaries Part 13

BUT. 
There was another book. And I also loved this book when I was 8, 9, 10... 




If you were at school in the late 80s to early 90s then YOU KNOW how popular Neighbours was and YOU KNOW what a treasure this book would have been to me. The amazing thing about it (apart from the subject matter, the cover stars, the colour photos) was that it was sent to me by my Aunt and Uncle in Australia. This wasn't some UK sourced unofficial Christmas annual from Woolworths - oh no! This was a potent, real, gen-you-eye-n artefact from the other side of the world and I absolutely adored it.







However. This book has a chequered past. When I was 9 or 10, it went missing. I searched high and low, couldn't find it anywhere. I was so upset. It literally dispappeared from my bedroom - there one day, not there the next. I hadn't misplaced it. I knew I hadn't misplaced it. There were a handful of friends who'd been in my bedroom the day it disappeared, and I knew one of them must have taken it. I just didn't know which one. I asked each of them, all denied it. My mum even went to speak to the other mums, just in case one of the girls had 'accidentally' picked it up. Allegedly, none of them had. 

A year or so passed. I was certain I'd never see the book again. And then... this is a little hazy - but what I recall is one of my friends told me she'd spotted it at another girl's house. Mum went to investigate. I was so nervous and excited while I waited for her to return. And when she did - she returned with the book. JOY, total joy. Best reunion evah. 








It had indeed been found in this girl's bedroom. She'd bare-faced lied to my bereft face when I'd asked her about it! But, well, she must have really wanted it and I can't really blame her for that - it was the most special and important book since ... Trev and Simon's Stupid Book.


Still get chills when I remember Scott and Charlene's wedding day. Mullets a-go-go. 

----------------------------------------

Quotes From My Teenage Diaries is an ongoing project as I re-read and reflect 
on the diaries I kept from the age of 11 to 16. 

You can read Part 1: BEST FRIENDS here
Part 2: CONGRATULATIONS here

Part 3: MY FIRST BOYFRIEND here,
Part 4: MY SOUL AMBITION here,
Part 5: MEATLOAF here,
Part 6: MARK OWEN here
Part 7: A KITTEN! here
PART 8: PHILLIP SCHOFIELD here
PART 9: I HAVE A FEW PLANS here
PART 10: HEATWAVE, here
PART 11: CHRISTIANITY, here
PART 12: TREV AND SIMON, here

There's a Facebook page too and soon - I hope - there will be a podcast. 
If you enjoyed this or can relate in any way - please do leave a comment or say hi on Facebook - 
it'd be lovely to hear from you.



Thursday, 6 July 2017

Trev and Simon's Stupid Book: Quotes From My Teenage Diaries Part 12

It's 1990, I'm nine years old and this is my favourite book. 



It is the funniest thing I have ever read. I take it to school and show it to everyone. At home I force my older brothers to read it, pushing the pages into their faces and saying, "Look! Look! Look how funny this is, aren't you impressed by it and therefore impressed by me, your little sister who you generally ignore???" Well - not saying that - but meaning that. 








Along with the diaries of Adrian Mole and the TV comedy of The Mary Whitehouse Experience, I have to say I feel like Trev and Simon's Stupid Book shaped me in some way - it certainly shaped my humour, and the way I use humour to connect with people.



The Kylie Minogue gag was probably my *favourite* favourite (I thought it was soooo funny and also clever), but I also loved Little Timmy and his balloon, the fake phone line ads, and I would have definitely ordered a My Little Plastic Fork if I could have done. 


I totally missed the Margaret Thatcher bashing - that's a nice little bonus as I read it now. 


So there you go - a true literary treat. 


(27 years on and technically I'm still pushing the pages of this book into people's faces.)


--------------------------------------------

Quotes From My Teenage Diaries is an ongoing project as I re-read and reflect 
on the diaries I kept from the age of 11 to 16. 

You can read Part 1: BEST FRIENDS here
Part 2: CONGRATULATIONS here

Part 3: MY FIRST BOYFRIEND here,
Part 4: MY SOUL AMBITION here,
Part 5: MEATLOAF here,
Part 6: MARK OWEN here
Part 7: A KITTEN! here
PART 8: PHILLIP SCHOFIELD here
PART 9: I HAVE A FEW PLANS here
PART 10: HEATWAVE, here
PART 11: CHRISTIANITY, here.

There's a Facebook page too and soon - I hope - there will be a podcast. 
If you enjoyed this or can relate in any way - please do leave a comment or say hi on Facebook - 
it'd be lovely to hear from you.


Thursday, 29 June 2017

Christianity: Quotes From My Teenage Diaries Part 11

A slight deviation this week. 
These photos aren't from a diary, they're from what was originally my RE exercise book when I was 12 (in 1993). 


The book was only half-full, so sometime in 1997 I repurposed it, along with a few other books from school, and used the blank pages to draft out poems, stories and letters to my penpals. So in that way these books transitioned into something more personal and diary-esque. When we get to the 1997 years I promise I will share those excruciating poems, stories and letters. 



But for now we're back in 1993, in Room N23 of my secondary school where Mr Eckersley - who I remember being the strictest teacher in the school - has us sitting in alphabetical order (boys on one side of the room, girls on the other) while he dictates information about the world's religions. My handwriting is lovely and I write in great and fluid detail about the life of Jesus, John the Baptist, the feeding of the 5000, the parable of the good samaritan...



It's so good in fact that I'm sure we must have just written what Mr Eckersley told us to write, because there are hardly any awkward sentences, questions, or areas where I didn't quite get it and the teachings. 


Apart from this one, perhaps:



I find this a little puzzling - why would I list Kenny Rogers as a modern day example of someone with too much money???



I think there are one or two instances of rebellion in the drawings - though they are very, very mild. I think the 'Jesus Heals' drawing has a little of my humour in it, partly because the man is wearing a string vest and I used to think they were hilarious, and also because it's quite abrupt and that gives it an air of disbelief. 



It's quite clear I had fun with the 'The Resurrection of Jesus: In Pictures' but not enough to get caught, or told off - which was pretty much how I spent the rest of my education - just on the right side of cheeky.



--------------------------------------------


Quotes From My Teenage Diaries is an ongoing project as I re-read and reflect 
on the diaries I kept from the age of 11 to 16. 

You can read Part 1: BEST FRIENDS here
Part 2: CONGRATULATIONS here
Part 3: MY FIRST BOYFRIEND here,
Part 4: MY SOUL AMBITION here,
Part 5: MEATLOAF here,
Part 6: MARK OWEN here
Part 7: A KITTEN! here
PART 8: PHILLIP SCHOFIELD here
PART 9: I HAVE A FEW PLANS here
PART 10: HEATWAVE, here

There's a Facebook page too and soon - I hope - there will be a podcast. 
If you enjoyed this or can relate in any way - please do leave a comment or say hi on Facebook - 
it'd be lovely to hear from you.

Wednesday, 21 June 2017

Heatwave, June 1995: Quotes From My Teenage Diaries Part 10

So apparently the last time we had a June heatwave quite like this one was in 1995. 
We're still in 1993 as far as my diary-sharing goes, but I thought I'd have a peek ahead to see if I mentioned it all. 

I did, and oof, I'm not happy. I go on to detail the fallings out amongst my friends (we are basically trying to out-do each other in terms of who feels things the most keenly: "Then she said SHE has had the hardest life out of all of us! Ha!") 



The most concerning aspect of all is that the fallings out, intense discussions, making friends again process was all so exhausting I didn't have time to fancy anyone on that dead hot day.




----------------------------------------------


Quotes From My Teenage Diaries is an ongoing project as I re-read and reflect 
on the diaries I kept from the age of 11 to 16. 

You can read Part 1: BEST FRIENDS here
Part 2: CONGRATULATIONS here
Part 3: MY FIRST BOYFRIEND here,
Part 4: MY SOUL AMBITION here,
Part 5: MEATLOAF here,
Part 6: MARK OWEN here
Part 7: A KITTEN! here
PART 8: PHILLIP SCHOFIELD here
PART 9: I HAVE A FEW PLANS here.

There's a Facebook page too and soon - I hope - there will be a podcast. 
If you enjoyed this or can relate in any way - please do leave a comment or say hi on Facebook - it'd be lovely to hear from you.

Thursday, 15 June 2017

Quotes From My Teenage Diary Part 9: I have a few plans


I'm 12 years old, it's November 1993 and I am very VERY excited about Christmas. The only way to channel this excitement is to write a really precise itinerary (almost 4 weeks in advance) about how I'll spend both Xmas Eve and Xmas Day. 






Actual evidence of a child "treating this house like a hotel"

Christmas Eve's plan is quite detailed and yet says nothing. I eat, go out, come back in again - and repeat - throughout the day. Just where was I going exactly?


And now for the itinerary of the main event: the plan for Christmas Day. I did several of these. Here are the first two.

Any parents out there: is 5.21 quite early for your kid to be getting you up?






Similar to the Christmas Eve schedule, there's a lot of detail but this time I list actual tangible things I will do, such as do my hair and "Sit on bed and say a prayer" (!!!) 
I'm also very delighted to see that I scheduled time in to "Get excited". 
A whole 4 minutes.


------------------------------------------


Quotes From My Teenage Diaries is an ongoing project as I re-read and reflect 
on the diaries I kept from the age of 11 to 16. 

You can read Part 1: BEST FRIENDS here
Part 2: CONGRATULATIONS here
Part 3: MY FIRST BOYFRIEND here,
Part 4: MY SOUL AMBITION here,
Part 5: MEATLOAF here,
Part 6: MARK OWEN here
Part 7: A KITTEN! here
PART 8: PHILLIP SCHOFIELD here

There's a Facebook page too and soon - I hope - there will be a podcast. 
If you enjoyed this or can relate in any way - please do leave a comment or say hi on Facebook - it'd be lovely to hear from you.

Wednesday, 7 June 2017

Quotes From My Teenage Diaries Part 8: PHILLIP SCHOFIELD


June 1993, I'm 12 years old and if you recall from the diary extracts I shared here on May 11th - my life had recently gone very JOSEPH - more specifically very PHILLIP SCHOFIELD. 

Here I am, hair freshly permed, face very cheeky, "meeting" my idol just days after that life-changing night at the Palladium. 



I can also reveal that if the hair clip and shirt weren't pink enough - I am also wearing pink jeans.


-----------------------------------------


Quotes From My Teenage Diaries is an ongoing project as I re-read and reflect 
on the diaries I kept from the age of 11 to 16. 

You can read Part 1: BEST FRIENDS here
Part 2: CONGRATULATIONS here
Part 3: MY FIRST BOYFRIEND here,
Part 4: MY SOUL AMBITION here,
Part 5: MEATLOAF here,
Part 6: MARK OWEN here
Part 7: A KITTEN! here.  

There's a Facebook page too and soon - I hope - there will be a podcast. 
If you enjoyed this or can relate in any way - please do leave a comment or say hi on Facebook - it'd be lovely to hear from you.

Wednesday, 31 May 2017

Quotes From My Teenage Diaries: Part 7: A Kitten!!!

Warning: Contains photos of actual teardrops which fell onto the pages of my diary. I then circled the teardrops and drew arrows to them with the word “teardrop” for good measure. 


A story of two halves. We begin in May 1993, I’m 12 years old and after a lifetime of wanting a proper pet (fish don’t count) I’m about to get one.  

I’d been asking my mum for a dog for AGES. Years. I asked for one every Christmas, birthday, Easter, bank holiday. I’d add the word ‘poodle’ to our shopping lists and hope for the best. It didn’t work. We were a single parent family with hardly any disposable income and the argument was always that dogs are expensive, and they're a big commitment, and who will take it for a walk? Duh - ME. And who will clean up after it? Duh - YOU. Etc etc. 

And then. Mum met a man, and after a while the man moved in. And the man also wanted a dog. Mum was still not convinced. The man told me to be patient, he’d convince her. And then one day we heard news of a birthing nearby - but not of the canine variety. Five tiny kittens had been born just around the corner from us and were now old enough to be given away. That day. Immediately. Every cat must go! 

As quick as you can say, “Pleeeeease Mum can I have one???” I was racing around to the house around the corner where, in the kitchen, two little kittens out of the five remained. Mum hadn't said “No” so I took that as a “Yes". There was a black one and a grey one. The grey one had lovely blue eyes and the fluffiest stripey coat and the cutest little face and I loved her and loved her and loved her and yes she was the one I chose. Using my imagination to full effect I decided to call the little grey cat ‘Smokey’. I picked her up and carried her home, and I was so so so so happy. A pet! A possession! A thing that was mine! Forever and ever and ever… only not.





Fast forward to October of that year. Smokey, now six months old and a staple part of the family and loved by all, even my Mum, didn’t come home one night. Or the next night. Or the next. Cats go missing for days on end don’t they, then they come back, maybe with a battle scar or a smaller deader animal as a gift. But Smokey didn’t come back, and we never found out what happened to her. 

There was the odd ‘sighting’, a friend saying they’d spotted a kind-of-grey stripey cat somewhere nearby, and I’d go and wait around that area to see if it was Smokey, but it never was. When I was older I’d periodically ask my mum if Smokey had been run over and the news had been kept from me but she always said no. It was just "one of those things”. 




(Funnily, a few days after Smokey came to live with us, she got ‘lost’. We couldn’t find her anywhere and I even went to the police station to report her missing. The sergeant on duty guffawed and told me that kittens don’t exist in the eyes of the law. Only horses and goats exist according to the police. I still have no idea what this meant. We later found Smokey sleeping on a pile of clothes in the bottom of my wardrobe.)  




I hope Smokey found another family to love her as much as I did. A year or so after she disappeared we heard the news that another kitten birthing had taken place nearby, and I didn’t need the man (he was off the scene by then anyway) to help me to convince Mum that we should get one. And lo - we got two! Two little beauties. But that’s a story for another day. 



Do you remember your first pet? (Reminder: fish don’t count) (Joke!) Feel free to write about him or her in the comments, whether the memory is happy or sad. If sad you could cry onto some paper and draw around the tears and label them too, if you like. 

--------------------------------------------

Quotes From My Teenage Diaries is an ongoing project as I re-read and reflect 
on the diaries I kept from the age of 11 to 16. 

You can read Part 1: BEST FRIENDS here
Part 2: CONGRATULATIONS here
Part 3: MY FIRST BOYFRIEND here,
Part 4: MY SOUL AMBITION here,
Part 5: MEATLOAF here,
Part 6: MARK OWEN here

There's a Facebook page too and soon - I hope - there will be a podcast. 
If you enjoyed this or can relate in any way - please do leave a comment or say hi on Facebook - it'd be lovely to hear from you.


Wednesday, 24 May 2017

Quotes From My Teenage Diaries: Part 6: Mark Owen



Its 1993, I’m 12 years old and I’m expressing myself visually. I’d like to make a few main points about this ‘piece’, but do spend a moment just taking it in as it stands before I, the artist, give my commentary. 


Where to start? 

  • Ok. The balloon. Shaped like a love heart. With a face. With a loose perm. Wearing a bow tie. There is also a bow in her / its hair which matches the bow tie on its neck - a nice detail. The balloon is speaking. It is saying: "Teresa 4 Mark Owen 4.E.T.G.F.D.T.C.” I’ve used these initials elsewhere in the diary and can reveal they mean "forever together for days to come.” I can also reveal that this was a LIE. Well, let's be kind - it was an untruth full of hope.
  • The self portrait. Apparently that’s me holding the balloon. With saucers for hands and feet and - well - how can I describe that hair? It’s a bit Marge Simpson. (In reality my hair at this age was more like the balloon’s.) 
  • The signatures just underneath the artwork are both mine. I don’t know why I signed it twice but I had a tendency to sign everything anyway - because that made it even more true and real and a fact, obviously. 
  • The ‘code' at the bottom about Take That: why did I devise a ‘code’ (I’m using the term loosely) and then translate it just below? BUT, actually - I haven’t translated it all - there are more letters after the word ‘sexy’: B.M.E.A.G.I.L.Q.G. What does it mean??? I have no idea. I left no clues. 
  • I see Phil (lip Schofield) gets a mention up at the top of the page so he must have still have been on my mind (and heart). Just not the balloon’s. The balloon is only making announcements about me and Mark Owen.

----------------------------------------------------------

Quotes From My Teenage Diaries is an ongoing project as I re-read and reflect 
on the diaries I kept from the age of 11 to 16. 

You can read Part 1: BEST FRIENDS here
Part 2: CONGRATULATIONS here
Part 3: MY FIRST BOYFRIEND here,
Part 4: MY SOUL AMBITION here,
Part 5: MEATLOAF here.

There's a Facebook page too and soon - I hope - there will be a podcast. 
If you enjoyed this or can relate in any way - please do leave a comment or say hi on Facebook - it'd be lovely to hear from you.

Wednesday, 17 May 2017

Quotes From My Teenage Diaries: Part 5: MEATLOAF


It's November 1993, I'm 12 years old and it seems I'm keen to use some free space in my diary to write out the lyrics of my favourite song: I would Do Anything For Love by Meatloaf.



In the pre-internet world there was only one way to do this, and it involved recording the song off of the radio onto cassette then making very good use of the play / pause button until you have all of the words written down for your own personal (singing along) reasons. 
But... I'm not sure I did that with this song - because of the bit where I confess, "I don't know the rest of this part, da de da da". Also I've called it "Words I *Know* To Meatloaf". 



So I must have been writing the words out from memory! No - from HEART. Which explains why I still know them all today - just a few months ago I heard this song for the first time in ages and some primal urge kicked in where I pretty much performed the song from start to finish (both male and female parts) with all the drama and flourishes required. 
I did totally love this song. And you know what - I still do. 
(Rides off on motorbike, hair and very loose white frilly blouse flowing behind me.)


(Or "tek off" on motorbike - the Yorkshire way to say it)


-----------------------------------------------------

Quotes From My Teenage Diaries is an ongoing project as I re-read and reflect 
on the diaries I kept from the age of 11 to 16. 

You can read Part 1: BEST FRIENDS here
Part 2: CONGRATULATIONS here
Part 3: MY FIRST BOYFRIEND here,
and Part 4: MY SOUL AMBITION here.

There's a Facebook page too and soon - I hope - there will be a podcast. 
If you enjoyed this or can relate in any way - please do leave a comment or say hi on Facebook - it'd be lovely to hear from you.